Strong Bad's Deal With The Devil
by Ohfortheloveofpete
Summary: In order to win a race against Homestar Runner, Strong Bad makes a deal with a demon. In other news...Marzipan's not the only girl anymore.
1. Chapter 1: The Homestarnomicon

_In this Homestar Runner fanfic, Homestar Runner and his friends are going to be visited by a demon! Oh no! But it's not as bad as it sounds...especially for Strong Bad._

 _In fact, he's going to be responsible!_

 **Chapter 1: The Homestarnomicon**

Homestar Runner (who for some strange reason decided to name the show after himself) was feeling rather cheerful today. Of course, when was there a time when he wasn't feeling cheerful? Of course, it probably helped that today was the day that he was going to get to participate in a race.

Wait, hadn't he already been in several races before? He had been in running races, car races, timed races, mine cart races...he had even raced to the moon!

And yet, somehow, he had managed to get trophies in those particular races every single time. Usually, he managed to score 1st place, though sometimes he did not always win.

His girlfriend Marzipan was very proud of him, to say the very least. In fact, she said that if he managed to win the race, she was going to give him a kiss.

Of course, she was probably going to give Homestar a kiss even if he DIDN'T win the race. She was his girlfriend and all that, even if Strong Bad had no idea what she saw in him.

Speaking of Strong Bad, he was going to be his opponent in the race. Unbeknownst to Homestar, Strong Bad was not planning to play fair...even during the practice rounds.

Nonetheless, he always lost to Homestar...most of the time. It was getting on his nerves.

And speaking of practice rounds, this was in fact a practice race. Both Homestar Runner and Strong Bad had decided to warm up before the real thing.

Currently, Strong Bad was planning to cheat...by having his buddy The Cheat put a banana peel on the race track. Ironic, eh?

Incidentally, The Cheat happened to like bananas.

Now all that was left to see if that would work. Alternatively he could simply run before Couch Z blew the whistle. Unsurprisingly, Couch Z was in charge of the race. He simply loved sports.

Incidentally, he was going to start the real race as well. He was glad that Homestar Runner and Strong Bad wanted to practice together before the actual race. It would be a more interesting race that way.

Unfortunately, he missed his chance to dash before the starting whistle.

"On your marks...get set...race!" exclaimed Couch Z, blowing said starting whistle.

"Darn it!" bellowed Strong Bad. Why didn't he do that before the start of the race? He was sure that Homestar Runner and the couch wouldn't notice.

Now he was going to have to try to keep up with Homestar Runner, as hard as that was. He wished that Homestar Runner wasn't so fast so that he would have a chance to win.

He was jealous about all the trophies that Homestar Runner had obtained. He had visited his house to TP it once and woe and behold, he could see about a hundred trophies looking out from the window alone.

This time it was going to be different. He was going to win this practice race against his opponent...and then he was going to win the _real_ race.

Homestar Runner would never know what would hit him...then again, he _never_ knew what hit him. Last week Strong Bad hit him on the head with a dodgeball and he hadn't noticed that Strong Bad had tossed it...even though he was standing just a few feet away from him.

He had just said "Hello" and then he was on his way.

Strong Bad ran across the race track, hoping to reach the finish line before Homestar Runner did.

Unfortunately, he still remained directly behind him.

As such, he decided to have the Cheat give him an unfair advantage.

Immediately, he gave the Cheat the signal...which was "Strong Bad is so much better than Homestar Runner."

A few seconds later, The Cheat put a banana peel on the track that Homestar Runner was using.

"Yes!" exclaimed Strong Bad. Now he was going to win this practice race for sure. Afterwards, he was going to win the REAL race.

Unfortunately, his plan turned out to have a flaw.

As soon as Homestar Runner slipped over the banana peel, he ended up falling on top of Strong Bad.

"Aah!" screamed Strong Bad.

"Whoa!" exclaimed Homestar Runner.

Fortunately, he was unhurt, and he dusted himself off.

"I need to watch where I'm going! Otherwise I'm not going to win the wace! It's a good thing that nice man caught me when I fell..." stated the runner.

A few seconds later, he continued heading towards the finish line.

Unfortunately for Strong Bad, he was not so lucky. He had stars around his head...stars that ironically resembled the star on Homestar Runner's shirt.

"Ow..." murmured Strong Bad, rubbing his head.

The Cheat immediately gave Strong Bad a First Aid Kit.

"Thanks..." answered the boxer as he put bandages on himself.

Unfortunately, it appeared that Homestar Runner had managed to cross the finish line while he was using the first aid kit.

"Yay! I won! Sort of! To be honest this was Strong Bad's idea...appawently he wanted me to chicken out of the weal wace because of how awesome he was..." said Homestar Runner.

And yet, HE was the one that had won the practice race. Perhaps he could win the real race too. He was looking forward to getting a new trophy, even if he didn't know where to put them all.

Maybe Couch Z could help him with that.

Strong Bad was feeling very frustrated. Every time he raced against Homestar Runner, it always seemed like he had managed to win against him. He was getting sick and tired of it.

This time he wanted to do something more drastic than resort to cheating.

What exactly could he do, though? He didn't have much time before the real race began..from what it said on his calendar, he only had a week. And coming up with elaborate plans to cheat like he would like to do would take a whole time.

The Cheat in particular seemed unhappy whenever he decided to use a complicated cheating method without testing it out first. Last time they had done that, both he AND Strong Bad had ended up in the hospital for two and a half weeks.

But on the lighter side of things...Marzipan WAS the nurse.

Of course, who else could the nurse be? She was the only girl in Free Country, USA.

And yet, for some strange reason, Strong Bad got the feeling that was going to change very soon. He wasn't quite sure why.

Maybe he was just losing his marbles...though he DID think of himself as a ladies' man despite his lack of girlfriend.

"Do you have any advice, Cheat? At this rate we're going to lose to Homestar Runner...and he's already beaten me six hundred and sixty-six times!" bellowed Strong Bad. Of course, that was probably an exaggeration...but the fact remained that he had grown tired of losing.

Why was he the title character, anyway? He had appeared in more Homestar Runner cartoons than he did. And since when did people send e-mails to him?

The Cheat nodded. This just might call for something drastic.

Curious, he seemed to have recalled Bubs having a sale at his concession stand. They could most likely find something that they could use to cheat at the upcoming race.

However, Strong Bad didn't seem too interested in visiting his shop. He could have sworn that Bubs was deliberately trying to sabotage his cheating attempts by giving him cheap materials.

"I don't trust him. Let's try somewhere else." answered the boxer.

"Meh meh meh!" exclaimed The Cheat.

"What? He's having a half-off sale? Well, fine, but only for a few minutes. We don't have much time before the race starts and Homestar Runner makes me eat his dust!" bellowed Strong Bad.

Strong Bad and The Cheat immediately headed towards Bubs' concession stand. Unsurprisingly, he was having a big sale.

And yet, there didn't appear to be a big line. How many citizens were there in Free Country, USA, anyway? It seemed kind of...quiet.

"Hey there! Are you here to buy my stuff!" exclaimed Bubs.

"Not really, it's crap." answered Strong Bad.

"Surely there's something here that you want to buy!" bellowed the salesman.

Cheat suggested that Strong Bad stay a little longer. He might be surprised what he could find.

Suddenly, he noticed what appeared to be a book. A rather sinister book.

Curious, he decided to examine it.

"What's this?" asked Strong Bad.

Apparently, it was known as the Homestarnomricon.

Incidentally, it had a picture of Homestar Runner's face on the cover...however, for some strange reason he looked just like a vampire. It was almost as if he was going to leap out of the book and drink his blood.

Strong Bad had no idea what that particular book was for, but he decided to check it out.

Suddenly, one of the lights in Bubs' concession stand went out.

"Darn it! Maybe I'm neglecting my electricity bill..." stated Bubs.

The Cheat started to feel rather nervous. There was something wrong with that book...and he got the feeling that there might be bad results if Strong Bad tried to read from it.

Now that he thought of it...how exactly DID the book end up in Bubs' concession stand?

"Interesting...apparently, I can use this to summon all sorts of creatures...wait, I can use this to summon Trogdor? Awesome!" exclaimed Strong Bad.

The Cheat began to panic. The legendary Trogdor? Did Strong Bad WANT to be burninated? He was all over the history books...he had lost count on how many times peasants had ended up inside his stomach.

If Strong Bad summoned him, Free Country, USA itself could be at risk.

"Meh meh meh!" exclaimed The Cheat. This was NOT a good idea. Strong Bad should discard that book while he had the chance.

Unfortunately, Strong Bad decided not to listen.

"Perfect! How much does it cost?" asked Strong Bad.

"I was thinking of giving it away, to be honest. Every time somebody buys the book, they end up returning it..." stated Bubs.

This worried The Cheat even more. Why exactly DID they return it?

"That doesn't answer my question!" exclaimed the boxer.

"It's 99 cents!" bellowed Bubs.

"99 cents? That's a steal!" shouted Strong Bad.

Oddly enough, Strong Bad actually HAD stolen from Bubs' concession stand in the past, even if he typically thought that he sold crap.

"Then it's sold!" exclaimed Bubs.

Curious, Strong Bad noticed that The Cheat had decided to flee.

"Where is he going? He's going to miss out on all the fun!" exclaimed Strong Bad. He was looking forward to finally winning a race against Homestar.

 _At night..._

"Well, it's time to give this book a test run...I don't even like reading books!" bellowed the boxer.

Still, if he managed to summon Trogdor, it was going to be worth it. Imagine having a fire-breathing dragon with a muscular arm on his side? It would be totally sweet!

He was going to use him to break Homestar Runner's legs so that he wouldn't be able to race. That way, he would be able to win by forfeit.

Of course, he didn't think of the possibility of someone else deciding to take his place...Pom Pom in particular would like to race too.

Nonetheless, thought that it was a brilliant plan...unfortunately, he did not think about how to stop Trogdor from burninating Free Country, USA once he was done serving him.

"Let's see how to summon Trogdor, shall we?" asked Strong Bad.

Immediately, he flipped the page towards where Trogdor was.

"Time to summon a dragon!" exclaimed the boxer.

However, at that very moment, the window opened and wind came in.

"What the-the weatherman didn't say that it was going to be windy today! I'm going to have a talk to him about this later..." stated Strong Bad.

Of course, considering that the weatherman was Homestar Runner, maybe this wasn't so surprising.

Unbeknownst to Strong Bad, the wind had flipped the pages to a different creature entirely.

In this case, it was a demon.

"Let's see how to do this..." stated the muscle man.

Apparently, he first needed to make a mandala.

"That's it?" asked Strong Bad, drawing a mandala with a crayon.

Next, he needed a blood sacrifice.

Fortunately, it appeared that his brother Strong Sad was cutting his wrists, so getting the blood wasn't so difficult either.

"OK..." answered the boxer. He found that to be somewhat disturbing...but at least he got what he wanted. Perhaps he should help Strong Sad later.

Finally, he needed to read from the book.

"What do I need to say?" asked Strong Bad.

He found it out a few minutes later.

"Alright, let's give it a shot..." stated the boxer. He had a good feeling about this...more than could be said about The Cheat.

"Dæmonium pessimum, et vocavi te in meam cogitationem pessimam!" exclaimed Strong Bad.

As soon as Strong Bad said those words, lightning began to strike outside. Again, he should really consult Homestar Runner on being a bad weatherman.

"I have no idea what any of those words mean, but I like it!" bellowed the boxer.

All of a sudden, he was feeling rather sleepy.

"Well, it's time for me to go to bed. Next week I'll be able to win that race for sure!" shouted the middle child of the Brothers Strong. Homestar Runner was not going to get that trophy on his watch.

Immediately, he went to his bed and began to snore.

 _Meanwhile..._

The Cheat was feeling very worried. It was raining heavily, and it was thundering very hard. Homestar Runner had not mentioned this in the weather report and all!

Then again, Homestar Runner wasn't the best weatherman in the world...as Strong Bad had already noticed.

Still, he got the feeling that there was something very wrong. It seemed very likely that Strong Bad had read from the Homestarnomicon despite his wishes.

If so, it might be up to him to slay Trogdor and do something about it...even if his efforts would probably prove to be futile. Trogdor had slain quite a few knights in the past that had gone off to save the princess.

Why did Trogdor want a princess, anyway?

Personally he wondered if he should talk to Strong Bad about this. How many creatures was he going to summon with that book? Judging from how big it was, there were probably a lot of them.

Free Country, USA could very well end up being overrun. Trogdor might in fact be the least of their worries.

Well, it was too dangerous to go out in this kind of weather. He was going to have to go visit his house once the weather subsided, however long that took.

Maybe he should consider buying an umbrella?

 _At Homestar Runner's house..._

"Hmm, it appeaws that my weather pwediction didn't come twue. Maybe I need to considah a diffewent job..." noted Homestar Runner. Hopefully he wasn't going to get fired, at least.

Suddenly, the lights in his house went out.

"Oh no! I must have fowgotten to pay the electwicity bill!" bellowed the athlete. Why was that so hard to remember?

Unfortunately, he could no longer see his surroundings.

Immediately, he crashed into the wall.

"Ow..." murmured Homestar Runner.

Ironically, he began to black out afterwards.

 _At Marzipan's house..._

Marzipan was feeling rather funny. All of a sudden, she didn't feel so unique anymore. It was as if something had changed in Free Country, USA.

However, she decided that it was probably nothing.

In other news, the rain was making her flowers bloom. She was rather happy about that...even if Homestar Runner said that it wasn't going to rain today.

Maybe he needed to research meteorology a bit more.

Well, maybe she could visit Homestar Runner tomorrow. He would want support for the upcoming race.

Perhaps she was the reason why he always won races. She always supported him in every single one of them.

In contrast, she never supported Strong Bad during his races. He never played fair at all. Why should she?

 _At the King Of Town's castle..._

"Hmm, for some strange I get the feeling that Free Country, USA is going to have a new citizen soon..." noted the King Of Town.

Ironically, despite declaring himself king, he was not actually the ruler of Free Country, USA. It was a democracy.

The Poopsmith was currently shoveling as usual. Why was the King Of Town's castle always so messy?

Perhaps he should welcome his new citizen with open arms.

Oh wait...he didn't have arms. Oh well.

Who exactly was the new citizen, though? He wanted to know who it was.

 _Meanwhile in Strong Bad's basement..._

At Strong Bad's house, the summoning was already underway. The mandala began to glow after Strong Bad had said the summoning words.

Shortly afterwards, smoke appeared.

Inside the smoke, there was a voice.

"What's this? It appears that someone had summoned me...well, I might as well find out who it was so I can do their bidding and all that..." stated the demon.

Immediately, they went to look for Strong Bad.

 _Oh dear...in retrospect, maybe Strong Bad shouldn't have read from the book. But on the plus side, there just might be a way to dismiss the demon in the Homestarnomicon._

 _Still, it'd probably be a lot worse if he did end up summoning Trogdor...you know how destructive he is..._


	2. Chapter 2: Making A Deal

_In this chapter, Strong Bad's going to make a deal! And before you ask, he's not going to sell his soul. His soul is kind of...precious to him._

 _That isn't to say that he isn't going to make a deal, though. Hey, that's what this fanfic is about._

 **Chapter 2: Making A Deal**

Strong Bad woke up from his bed, ready to start a brand new day...and answer a few emails. He always got lots of fan mail...he was starting to wonder if he got more fan mail than Homestar Runner himself.

If so, he was very happy about it. He could brag about it to Homestar. Maybe one day HE could be the star of the website. They could call it .

On the other hand, he did appear in more toons than Homestar Runner did. It was rather ironic.

Curious, he began to hear a voice.

"Are you the person that summoned me?" asked the voice.

"What? No no no! I would never summon such an evil thing!" exclaimed Strong Sad.

"That's too bad. I can do you a lot of favors...though I will admit there's a price."

Apparently, his brother was having a conversation with someone...but with who? He had never heard such a voice before. Perhaps Free Country, USA had a visitor? Or maybe The Cheat had somehow learned how to talk...or maybe the Poopsmith was finally breaking his vow of silence.

The voice in question sounded rather feminine...though the voice in question was deeper in pitch than Marzipan's. Was Marzipan smoking cigarettes?

Either or that, Marzipan wasn't the only girl anymore...though he supposed maybe they simply had a feminine voice despite you know, being a guy.

"Well, let me know when you see him. I believe that he wanted to make a deal with me...maybe he wants fame and fortune?" asked the voice.

Suddenly, he began to realize who this individual could possibly be.

Strong Bad began to feel rather excited. It looked like his plan had worked! Perhaps Bubs ACTUALLY had sold him something useful for a change.

Maybe he should go thank him.

But for now, it was time to make a deal. This time, HE would win.

Curious, he could make out what appeared to be a tail. He began to feel rather excited. It looked like he had managed to summon Trogdor!

This was going to be awesome! Now everyone would respect him...because he had Trogdor on his side! Nobody would dare think that he wasn't cool.

"Hey there, Trogdor! I'm so glad that I managed to summon you! Now I can clobber Homestar Runner and win that cool tro-"

He stopped talking when he noticed that who he had summoned wasn't Trogdor at all.

As it turned out, he had summoned what appeared to be a demon...a female demon, incidentally. She had horns on her head, a forked tail, red skin, as well as black fur on her chest and from the waist down. Also, she had long, black hair that went down to her backside.

Finally, she happened to have red-colored eyes. Notably, her scleras were black instead of red.

Strong Bad was not happy with the turn of events.

"You're not Trogdor!" exclaimed Strong Bad.

"Why would you want to summon someone so dangerous?" asked the demon. Even the fiercest members of her kind were terrified of him.

"Because he's awesome!" bellowed the boxer.

"Yes...he's awesome at destroying everything you hold dear." answered the devil.

"What is your name, anyway?" asked Strong Bad.

"It's Inferna. Pleased to meet you. Now about making our deal...what exactly do you want? Fame and fortune? Power? Babes? What?" stated Inferna.

"I was hoping to win a race against that obnoxious Homestar Runner! I keep losing to him! It's making people think I'm uncool!" exclaimed the middle child of the Brothers Strong.

"That's it? You want to win a race? I suppose I should be grateful you're not asking for much..." answered the demon.

"I still think I should summon Trogdor..." stated Strong Bad.

"How did you summon me, anyway?" asked Inferna. He didn't look like he was some sort of wizard. In fact, he looked like he was some sort of boxer.

For some strange reason, he didn't appear to be wearing a shirt. So much for "no shirt, no shoes, no service".

"I used this book...I could have sworn I flipped to the page where Trogdor was...ah, there we go..." answered Strong Bad.

"I...really wouldn't do that if I were you..." stated Inferna.

At that very moment, The Cheat showed up. Oddly enough, he was dressed in armor and was wielding a sword.

Apparently, he was off to slay a dragon...you can probably guess which one.

"Hey, the Cheat! Are you going to some medieval costume party?" asked Strong Bad.

Curious, the Cheat looked around, and noticed that there did not appear to be a dragon around.

On the other hand, there did appear to be a demon...but that wasn't his main concern right now. Had Trogdor already left and was wreaking havoc on the citizens of Free Country, USA?

If so, he was worried for his life...and everyone else's.

"Meh meh meh meh meh!" exclaimed The Cheat.

"What? You're wondering where Trogdor is? I haven't summoned him yet! All I've summoned is a demon...a demon who I might add is going to help me with the race..." answered Strong Bad.

Inferna waved.

Immediately, The Cheat picked up the book. Fortunately, it appeared that Strong Bad had not even summoned Trogdor yet. So it looked like it was his lucky day.

He needed to get rid of that book before it did some serious damage.

Suddenly, he picked up the Homestarnomicon.

However, Strong Bad noticed what he was doing.

"The Cheat? What are you doing with my book?" asked the boxer.

"Meh meh meh!" bellowed The Cheat.

"What? You're going to throw it in the garbage? Why would you want to do that?" inquired Strong Bad. They had just gotten that book, too.

Curious, The Cheat wondered how he could get Strong Bad to throw away the book. Unfortunately, he didn't seem to realize what could happen if he tried reading out more creatures from the book. He had already summoned a demon, and he had no idea what he would read out of the book next.

Fortunately, he came up with an excuse.

"Meh meh meena!" exclaimed Strong Bad's sidekick.

"What? It's old and dusty? Let me see that!" bellowed Strong Bad, taking the book from The Cheat's hands.

Curious, Strong Bad decided to examine it.

"Whoa! This book is old and dusty! Does Bubs even have a dustpan?" asked the boxer.

Immediately, he began to dust it off.

However, in the process, some of it got in Inferna's nose.

"Ah-ah-choo!" bellowed Inferna.

As it turned out, Inferna sneezed fire...and she ended up igniting the Homestarnomicon.

"Oh no! The book! It's on fire!" exclaimed Strong Bad.

The Cheat leapt in the air. It looked like he wasn't going to have to worry about the book pretty soon. Apparently, it wasn't fireproof at all.

"Do something, The Cheat!" bellowed the boxer.

The Cheat nodded. He went into the kitchen.

Immediately, he noticed that there was a fire extinguisher in the kitchen.

However, he also noticed that there was some flammable oil that he could use.

He could simply use the fire extinguisher to put out the book...but there was no way he was going to let Strong Bad endanger their lives just so that he could summon creatures that he thought were cool.

So, he was going to select the oil sprayer.

He picked it up and went back to Strong Bad.

It appeared that he had better hurry, because the flames were starting to die down.

"Thank goodness! I was worried that I was going to lose the book..." stated Strong Bad.

"Yeah...that book's probably a rental..." noted Inferna.

Immediately, Strong Bad picked up the oil sprayer and put it on the book.

"Um..." stated the demon.

"What?" asked Strong Bad.

Not suspecting anything, Strong Bad poured oil on the book.

Once again, the flames began to ignite.

"Wait a minute, this isn't water, this is oil! Why didn't you use the fire extinguisher, The Cheat?" asked Strong Bad. They kept one in case of emergency...though Strong Bad typically used it simply to spray Homestar Runner.

The Cheat rubbed his hand behind his head. Was Strong Bad onto him? He wouldn't want to jeopardize their friendship even if the book DID need to be destroyed.

"Well, it's too late to do anything about it now! The book is ash!" exclaimed the boxer.

Inferna was about to apologize for accidentally setting it on fire...but now that she thought of it...who exactly was to blame for the burning of the book?

She wasn't quite sure.

"Well, this is just perfect! Now I can't use the book to summon any more monsters! I'm just an average bum again! Well, relatively speaking...I'm still the coolest guy in Free Country, USA!" bellowed Strong Bad.

Inferna noted that The Cheat seemed a lot happier about it than Strong Bad was. Perhaps it was for the best that the book was destroyed. Strong Bad clearly wasn't going to handle the book responsibly.

However, The Cheat had noticed that though the book had been destroyed, Inferna had not being sent back to the fiery inferno that he felt that she belonged in. Maybe he should have waited for Strong Bad to dismiss the demon before he attempted to have the book destroyed.

"So, where were we? You wanted me to help you with the race, right? I suppose if you're going to win that race you're going to need to get ready..." stated Inferna.

Strong Bad personally was hoping to cheat his way through the race as usual...but some exercise would be nice. He wanted to be the manliest guy in Free Country, USA...or at least more manly than Homestar Runner.

He was more manly than Strong Sad, at least. That was for sure.

Suddenly, Strong Bad remembered something. He hadn't checked his E-Mail in a while. His fans were going to want him to answer his mail.

"I'll be right back..." stated Strong Bad.

Curious, Inferna wondered where Strong Bad was going.

Immediately, she followed Strong Bad, stopping right outside his room so that she could take a peek.

As it turned out, he was answering his e-mail.

In this case, it was from his younger brother, Strong Sad.

"Dear Strong Bad, are you plotting to take over the world or something? I noticed that you bought the Homestarnomicon from Bubs' concession stand...I heard that it's full of dangerous creatures that you can get to obey you...I wouldn't touch that book with a 49-and-a-half-foot pole...speaking of which have you seen my 49-and-a-half-foot pole? I seem to have lost it...Sincerely, your brother Strong Sad." read Strong Bad.

Strong Bad decided to answer Strong Sad's e-mail.

"Dear Strong Sad, why would I want to do that? I'm already the ruler of Strongbadia! I just bought that book so that I could get back at Homestar Runner for making me get second place all the time. Do I look like I always deserve second place to you? As for your 49-and-a-half-foot pole...why do you want it so badly? I've never seen you use it..." said the boxer.

However, before Strong Bad could send the e-mail, he realize that he had to use the bathroom.

"I'll send that after I use the john..." thought Strong Bad.

Immediately, he left, not noticing Inferna as he did so.

Curious, Inferna decided to try using the computer while Strong Bad was gone.

"Let's see now..." stated Inferna.

After reading what Strong Sad had to say, she suddenly had a rather mischievous idea.

Immediately, she deleted what Strong Bad was going to say to Strong Sad.

She then came up with her own answer for that particular question.

"Dear Strong Sad, absolutely. You are completely and utterly at my mercy. You had better start begging it for it. And not even your precious 49-and-a-half-foot pole is going to save you! Soon I shall rule the world and there's nothing that you can do to stop me! Hahahaha!" signed Inferna.

She then sent the e-mail and left Strong Bad's room before he noticed what was going on.

Sure enough, Strong Bad entered the room a few minutes later.

"Alright, time to get back to business...wait, where did the e-mail Strong Sad sent me go? Oh well. I'll just answer another e-mail..." stated the boxer.

Immediately, he decided to answer another e-mail. This time, it was from a boy named Larry.

"Dear Strong Bad, are you sure that summoning a demon is such a good idea? From Larry in Chicago." read Strong Bad.

"Of course it's a good idea! I get to beat Homestar Runner! What's the big deal?" asked the middle child of the Brothers Strong, sending his message back.

He then left to get to work on beating Homestar Runner.

"So...are you going to train me to be a runner or something?" asked Strong Bad.

"Yeah, pretty much." answered Inferna.

Suddenly, Strong Sad approached Strong Bad. He was sweating uncontrollably.

Strong Bad wondered why his brother was so frightened.

"Huh?" asked the boxer.

"Don't hurt me! I'll do anything! You are my master and I am your servant!" screamed Strong Sad.

"What's his problem?" asked Strong Bad.

Inferna chuckled to herself. It looked like Strong Sad had received the letter that she had sent. He had no idea what had really happened.

"You are dismissed...I guess."

Strong Sad left. He seemed rather relieved.

"Let's get you running, shall we?" asked Inferna.

Strong Bad nodded. He was going to completely outclass Homestar Runner at the race, he was sure of that.

He was going to eat his dust...if the King Of Town didn't eat it first.

 _A few minutes later..._

As it turned out, Inferna had set up a makeshift obstacle course for Strong Bad to get ready with.

Unfortunately, he tripped and fell on his face the first few seconds he started to run.

"Oof!" exclaimed Strong Bad. Was he going to trip at the finish line too?

"Oh dear..." murmured Inferna.

Fortunately, he was uninjured.

"Oof!" exclaimed Strong Bad.

Nonetheless, he kept on running, stopping for a minute to catch his breath.

"Keep going!" bellowed Inferna.

Strong Bad kept on going until he reached the finish line.

"Good job!" exclaimed the demon.

"How long did I take?" asked Strong Bad.

"About half an hour..." answered Inferna.

"Half an hour? I thought I was a speed demon!" exclaimed the boxer. He should have finished the race in under a minute!

"Unfortunately, you appear to have an overinflated opinion of yourself..." remarked the demon. Maybe that was why he called himself Strong Bad.

"Grr..." thought Strong Bad. He was going to have to do better than that if he was going to defeat Homestar Runner. Homestar Runner was the fastest person in Free Country, USA...which admittedly wasn't heavily populated.

Unbeknownst to them both, Marzipan had noticed that she wasn't the only girl in the area anymore. Now how was she going to tell people that she was the only girl?

On the other hand, maybe there wouldn't be so many people asking her on a date anymore.

Immediately, she decided to go talk to Homestar Runner about it.

"Hi, Mawzipan! So glad to see you!" bellowed Homestar Runner.

"Hey there, Homestar. Guess what? I don't think I'm the only girl anymore..." answered Marzipan.

"Wha-what?!" exclaimed the athlete, his hat nearly falling off his head.

"And I think Strong Bad might have a girlfriend now..." stated the hippie.

"You have got to be kidding me!" exclaimed Homestar.

"It's no joke, Homestar." answered Marzipan. So much for her trophies saying "Only Girl". She was going to have to toss those out, it seemed.

"Is the wowld going to end?" asked the runner.

"I don't think so. This website's been around for quite some time..." said Homestar's girlfriend.

"Oh yeah..." noted Homestar Runner. He did admit that it had gone through a massive hiatus...but other than that it appeared that the website was fine.

"Oddly enough she happened to have horns on her head and had red skin as well as a tail...maybe she's some sort of demon?" asked Marzipan.

"A demon? Oh no! To the bat cave!" exclaimed Homestar.

"Since when do you have a bat cave?" inquired Homestar's girlfriend.

"How else would I play baseball?" asked the runner.

"But you don't have arms..." pointed out Marzipan.

"I use my mouth!" explained Homestar.

"OK...forget I asked..." stated the hippie. "I don't see how bats will help us ward off demons though..." said the hippie. On the other hand, maybe the demon wasn't actually evil.

"This is so hard! How do you even get wid of a demon?" asked the demon.

Back at the race track, Inferna sneezed again. Apparently she still had dust in her nose.

"Bless you!" exclaimed Strong Bad.

Inferna gasped.

Back at Marzipan's house, Marzipan and Homestar Runner were plotting what they should do about the demon.

How did a demon get in Free Country, USA anyway? Did someone open a portal to the underworld?

Marzipan wondered if she should consult Homestar on the matter.

However, she then remembered that she had seen the demon with Strong Bad. She seemed to be helping him with something. Maybe she should ask Strong Bad instead.

But before she did that, it was time to water her flowers.

"Time to share some love!" exclaimed Marzipan as she pulled out a watering can.

"Woohoo!" bellowed Homestar.

"I'm going to share love with you later, Homestar..." answered the hippie.

"Oh." complained the runner. He was hoping for a kiss.

 _Well, it looks like Strong Bad's plan has worked. He has summoned a demon and now she's going to help him win a race._

 _And yes, it's hard to say who's responsible for the destruction of the Homestarnomicon, though it probably doesn't really matter considering that it's a good thing._


End file.
